Happy Valentines Day, I Burned the Noodles
by The Lori C
Summary: Brian attempts a homemade meal for Phoebe, with some less than stellar results.


_Another stupid Hallmark holiday,_ Brian thought.

It was one thing to send a box of truffles to Paul just for the thought because they'd been best friends for years (not to mention for laughs considering the truffles were in a heart shaped box tagged "From Your Secret Admirer" in Spanish), but doing something for Phoebe was something else altogether.

For one, she was a simple woman, not one for drama, and even their wide age difference hadn't mattered that much. Out of all the women fans and friends, Pheebs had stood out the most. She'd taken no bullshit, she was intelligent, funny, and a good listener. Frankly, within the past year, Brian had cared a great deal about her, and after going back and forth online for so long, fate had finally brought them together.

Thank God for her friend Marsha, and even Zeke for that matter. Both had advised Brian well that since Phoebe wasn't one for anything fancy, not to go all out. But why not? She was miles from home and he had to do better than just a card even though Phoebe had insisted that was just fine.

"Why not just make her dinner?" Marsha suggested one evening. "And if you need any ideas for that, Pheebs loves pasta."

"Spaghetti?" Brian thought out loud.

"Would work just fine," Marsha encouraged. "And don't go nuts getting chocolate; a small box should suffice. You know how she is about weight issues."

"I don't know why; Phoebe's fine the way she is," he replied. "But yeah, the dinner thing is a good idea."

"Oh yeah, and she likes pink carnations! You may want to pick up one of those for a special effect."

"I didn't even think about that part. Marsha, you are a genius as always. Thanks a bunch."

"Hey, what are friends for?" she replied.

When Brian had talked to Zeke later and laid out the plans Marsha had suggested, the big man let out a howl of laughter.

"What?" Brian gave him a confused look. "And for reference, it was _another woman _who suggested it. Pheebs' friend Marsha, in fact."

"Nothing like telling your Valentine that you're cooking the Valentine's Day meal to make her laugh until she pisses herself," Zeke howled. "Seriously, man, you'd burn water in the microwave."

"I do not," Brian snorted. "And while you're being a smart ass, what are you doing for your girl?"

"What every sane man does," Zeke replied. "Taking her to a nice French restaurant and giving her a tennis bracelet."

"Wow, nothing like a big black dude in a French restaurant. You'll really stand out for sure." Now it was Brian's turn to laugh.

"You're lucky you're both an associate and I like you or I'd have no problem squashing you like a bug right about now for that smart remark."

"Easy, big man," Brian grinned, "but let's see who's laughing the hardest after your woman and Phoebe compare notes later."

"I can't wait for the comedy to unfold on Phoebe's part," Zeke said with a parting grin.

_That evening:_

"It was nice to invite me over, but you didn't have to do that just to give me my card," Phoebe said.

"I got more than just a card in mind, Pheebster," Brian replied. "You are about to be treated to a home cooked meal by yours truly."

Phoebe was clearly impressed. "Wow, talk about going all out. And very original."

"I can't take all the credit, though. It was Marsha who kind of suggested it." He handed her a single carnation.

Phoebe took it, smiling. "How did you know I liked these? Oh wait….Marsha, right?"

He blushed a little. "Um….yes."

She kissed his cheek. "You are the most adorable thing. And that sauce smells delightful."

"Thanks," Brian replied, not having the heart to tell her it had been jar sauce that had been 'fixed up.' "I'm going to go start the noodles."

Phoebe found a small container and put the carnation in it before going to sit down and admire the card. Brian soon joined her, and before very long, both of them were engrossed in a movie.

A short time later, Phoebe thought she'd smelled something burning and took another whiff.

"Brian?"

"Hmmm?"

"Do you smell anything?" she asked slowly.

"Oh, fuck!" he cried, heading for the kitchen quickly. "The noodles!"

Phoebe then heard a groan, followed by, "Way to go, Brian. Now whole night is ruined."

"What's wrong?" she wondered.

"Happy Valentine's Day, Phoebe; I burned the noodles. Zeke _was _right; I would burn water."

Phoebe had to smile. "Oh, Bri. It's not the end of the world. Let's just order something. It's not like the world is going to know anyway."

"At least let me treat for nearly setting the kitchen on fire," he replied.

"I'll even let you pick."

_Most girls would have laughed at me being such a doofus, _he thought as she handed him his phone, smiling. _How did I get so lucky ending up with someone as understanding as Phoebe?_

_The next day:_

"So how was your big night?" Zeke asked knowingly. "I see you survived the blond one's cooking."

Brian shot him a dirty look as Phoebe replied, "It went very well, thank you. If I must say so, Brian outdid himself."

Zeke had a confused look. "Oh? How was that, and what did the big dinner end up being?"

"Lasagna," Phoebe replied with a sincere smile. "And it was _outstanding."_

"Are you sure something wasn't put in it in to alter your brain?"

"What's the matter, Zeke?" Brian grinned widely, now clearly on to the game Phoebe was playing. "Shocked that yours truly can please a lady in more ways than one?"

"A guy that can't boil an egg without it exploding made lasagna. I never thought this day would come."

"Trust me, Zeke, your associate here has many hidden talents," Phoebe nodded.

"Uh…yeah, sure. Anyway, catch you folks later."

Watching the big man walk away even more perplexed, Brian turned to Phoebe, laughing. "What was all that about?"

"For us to know and him to find out that your 'outstanding' lasagna actually came from Pizza Hut. But that is our little secret." She put her arm in his and they walked toward the parking lot.

"In that case, maybe I should burn noodles every Valentine's Day."


End file.
